AristoKat’s Randomosity

So, seeing as how I have just ranted about my bad day, I feel that it is now a good time to write some of the things that people have said to us throughout the years. I have now been at my company for eight years, and I have seen and heard many an asshole in my time. So, if you think I’m making this up, I invite you to go to a phone receptionist or customer service rep, and they’ll probably have quite a few crazy stories to tell you themselves.

Okay, so here we go, in no particular order.

1.) A few years ago, I believe I was about.. 16 or so, my co-worker had a call from a guy who was trying to schedule an appointment. So here’s the dialogue:

Freak: “How much is this service on my car gonna cost?”
Co-Worker: “It’ll be about $200.”
Freak: “TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS?! For two hundred dollars I may as well do it myself! Hell, for two hundred dollars, I’ll give you the money and YOU can do it. No, no for two hundred dollars, I’ll go buy a twelve pack of beer, and you and I can service my car together!”
Co-Worker: “…….”
Freak: >click<

Yeah, if I had said some insane psychotic mildly perverted thing to a poor girl I had never met in my entire life, I probably would have hung up and never called back. Ever. She was upset and disgusted for a little while, but we ended up laughing about it.

2.) This is not so funny as it is irritating. If there is one thing I truly cannot stand is any kind of racist person raping my ears with their ignorant bullshit. I really wish that I would get these calls because I’m not at all afraid to put these people in their places. This one was last year I believe, around August, with a different co-worker.

Co-Worker: “How may I help you?”
Sadly Racist Woman: “Yes, may I have New Sales?”
Co-Worker: “Sure, hold please”

The call was then transferred. Fifteen seconds later, the phone rings again.

Sadly Racist Woman: “Listen, can you send me to someone who isn’t middle eastern. I want an american. Do you understand? I mean, I live by myself and I know how those people are and I just would prefer if you would put me with an american. I’m not racist but you know how those people are”
Co-Worker: “I’m sorry ma’am but most of our salesmen are american and-”
Sadly Racist Woman: <interrupts> “I want someone who can speak english. Please name me off your salesmen.”

My co-worker went on to name them, and she picked the most “american” name she heard. It was all sorts of crazy. This call with this woman actually took about twenty minutes. She called during lunch time and wanted to speak with one of our managers, and the only one around was my manager who is Puerto Rican. Yeah, she hung up and called back about fifteen times before she finally found someone she was satisfied with. It’s so sad, she really didn’t think she was racist, but she kept contradicting it. Ignorance is not bliss, and it hurts other people.

3.) This one was SO annoying, and it’s funny because ever since it happened about five or so years ago, EVERYONE here knows who he is. Let me warn you: If you’re an asshole, people make a way of remembering. Especially if you are a crazy asshole who goes apeshit on employees. We like to know who we deal with. So this is how it went:

Sexist Shit: “I want to make an appointment.”
Female Co-Worker: “Okay sir, I can do that for you, what’s your last name?”
Sexist Shit: “I want to speak with someone in the service department.”
Female Co-Worker: “I’m in the service department sir, may I have your last name?”
Sexist Shit: “They let women work in service? That’s ridiculous.”
Female Co-Worker: “Excuse me sir?”
Sexist Shit: “It’s completely absurd, women don’t know anything about cars!! You shouldn’t even be answering the phone, women just should NOT work at a car dealership. Let me talk to the manager, I’m sure HE’S a man.”
Female Co-Worker: “I’ve been in the car industry for eight years but I’ll get my manager for you.”

So then she did, and in so many words our service manager told this guy that yes our dealer does employ women because within our walls we are equal. He also said that if he had a problem with that, he could take his shitty car somewhere else if he didn’t like it, and that if he wanted to keep coming to us, he’d have to deal with the fact that women work here and if he got out of line again, he’d be fired. That was an awesome day. He has yet to insult us again.

4.) My co-worker has been raised in the US since she was six. She has no accent whatsoever, she’s just very softspoken. This was just stupid.

Co-worker: May I help you?
Deaf Idiot: “Do you even speak english?”

We transferred that person somewhere else. I think they must have gotten infected with herpes that day or something.

5.) This just happened yesterday. This was the most ridiculous thing in the world and I almost flipped out, strangely enough I feel that I’m unbelievably mature. I was very quick and calm with my answers until I thought I may not be able to handle it and I gave it to someone else.

Clueless Airhead: Who are you?
Me: This is __ ____ ___.
Clueless Airhead: No, who are YOU?
Me: This is Kat with ___ ______ ______.
Clueless Airhead: Someone called me from there, I want to know who it was.
Me: Do you have a name for the person that called you, or did they leave a message?
Clueless Airhead: No, can’t you just tell me?
Me: I’m sorry ma’am, we have over one hundred employees that work here and I wouldn’t be able to tell you who made the call.
Clueless Airhead: Can’t you look it up by my record or something?
Me: Is your car in for service?
Clueless Airhead: NO, I don’t know who called me, I want you to tell me NOW, are you incapable of doing that?!

(At this point, I’m thinking holy shit, is this biznatch for real? Yeah, I’m going to tap in to NASA’s satellite system so I can GPS who called you, you friggin psycho.)

Me: I’m sorry, I don’t have the capability to look up who called you. It could have been a wrong number.
Clueless Airhead: LISTEN, I’m on a five minute break from my job and I have a missed call from your number and I want to know who it is that called me. Can’t you even do that? This is ridiculous!”

When you’re that big of a frigid bitch, and you get buck wild because your head is so far up your own ass that you think it’s completely incomprehensable that maybe someone called you by MISTAKE, that’s when I stop talking. This was for like four minutes which is an eternity when you’re usually on and off the phone in less than a minute. She thought I was the biggest idiot because I couldn’t tell her which one of our hundred phone lines dialed her number at some point in the day. Yeah, I’m the idiot right? Get a clue… and some manners.

6.) This one was so unbelievably out of line, that I once again wish it had been me that took this call. My poor co-worker took it and she’s too nice to know what to do sometimes. I lack that niceness bone, I know that there is a line that can be crossed and this was a leap over it.

Senile Racist: “Who’s the sales manager?”
Co-Worker: “It’s ________.”
Senile Racist: “Now, I talked to him this past weekend. Is he American?”
Co-Worker: “I believe so sir”
Senile Racist: “He didn’t know what the word poem was. You know POEM? P-O-E-M? Don’t you think it’s ridiculous that he’s an american, and didn’t know what poem was?”
Co-Worker: “….”
Senile Racist: “Give me someone in sales”

So she did, and proceeded to hang up on a few of our salesmen, and calling back. I believe this was the third time he called back where it all got buck wild.

Senile Racist: “Would you stop sending me to all these salesmen that can’t talk english?? What are they african or something? Don’t you have any americans that work there?”
Co-Worker: “I believe that they are american sir.”
Senile Racist: “No. I want someone who can speak english. You can’t tell me that you all can’t afford to pay real americans to work for you. You got all these africans working there. You know, tell your boss that he needs to spend more money so that you all can hire some americans to work for you and you can get the .. you know what, I want you to tell your boss directly that his customers are complaining. Tell him.”
Co-Worker: “….I’m sorry sir I don’t have direct contact to him, but I can take a message down and leave it with his secretary if you’d like.”
Senile Racist: “Too lazy to take a message huh? You must be african too.” >click<

What the hell is that?! Old senile shit. First off, everyone that works with us speaks perfect english. Some may have an accent, but it’s all perfect. We are a no hassle dealership and everyone here is so friendly and helpful. How DARE he. And what the hell would be wrong with being African anyway? He never called back as far as any of us know, but that day I was so pissed. The conversations with him ended up being about 25 minutes in total. That’s so ridiculous.

There’s a point I’m trying to make with all this, and I’ll have to write it quickly. When you call someone, do not assume that your problems are more important or more dire than theirs. We are trained to not allow our feelings to show through, so no matter what is going on in our own lives, we do not allow anyone to think we are anything other than happy.

Do not yell, cuss, insult, belittle or try to threaten anyone when you call them. All we can do is try to help you, however sometimes, usually when it hits the screaming in our ears part, we may become unwilling to help you as the situation would have turned very disrespectful and uncomfortable. A few of us have cried at things people have said to us, we’re just people. We’re not servants, we’re just here to service you.

Learn some manners, and if you still feel like being an asshole, then do it once you hang up. I’ll write more later, it’s 8pm and my last 13 hour shift is done with!

<3 siempre,
AristoKat